Hooray, good news

The surgery was definitely successful. Sierra says the pathology report was music to her ears. That made me happy! There is no cancer in the lymph nodes that were removed and the margins had no cancer. This is very good news. As to what is next, that is still a bit of a mystery. The tumor board will discuss my case next Friday, September 4 and I will see a medical oncologist on September the 8th. He too is new to Kaiser, coming from UCSF. Honestly, I wish I had all the answers now. Don't get me wrong though, I am glad to have the professionals all discussing my situation to be sure I get the best care that is possible. There is a good chance that the protocol will be that no further treatment is necessary than the surgery.
It has been a different day. I took a stronger pain killer for the drive to SF. I am very slow moving, slow thinking, and less emotional than normal. I am finding it a bit challenging to even write here in the blog.
Here are the highlights of the day:
Good news from Dr. Powell!!!!
Spending time with my dear friend Nancy who drove me to SF and back
Visiting my sister in law Lindy in her back yard in SF and getting about 20 movies from her to watch while I continue to recover. Dr. Powell says I have about 4 more weeks of this recovery business.
Going to the grocery store....I haven't been anywhere for almost two weeks and it was fun to be in a grocery store!
And to top it off to recieve a video made for me, from the people who I consider to be my friends that I love and respect at Watkins (the manufacturer of HotSpring Spas). I actually smiled, laughed and cried as I watched it.

Danny just walked into the house with fresh veges and fruit. We have a lot to celebrate!

My mom is home now. Next week I will be on my own at home while Danny is working. If you want to spend time with the squirrels and the birds, come and visit!

This blog is a great way to communicate to many people at one time, and it overwhelms me that I have wonderful people in my life that care! Believe me your caring touches me more deeply than you can ever know. Sending you all much much love!

patience

Healing takes time.
I thought since I came home from the hospital fast I would miraculously be all better in a few days.
I now know that my job right now is to be patient and let the natural course of healing occur. My big culprit is a lot of swelling. If I stand for even five minutes I feel the difference. So, I have been spending most of the day laying down. (no walks in the flat yet...this will come soon I hope) This is different for me! I must say I am very lucky to have such a wonderful place to heal. The mornings have been cold and foggy, but the afternoons have been gorgeous. My afternoons have been spent laying on different chaise lounges under the trees, watching birds and squirrels play, reading books and visiting with people I love and cherish.
Danny and my mom have been nurturing me all day long. I am very lucky to have such great caregivers.
Friday will be a big day. Another drive to SF and in the rush hour this time. I expect to learn if surgery is all the treatment needed or if more decisions need to be made. I am actually okay with not knowing until Friday. I am preparing myself to accept what ever news I receive in the best way that I can.
I love visits, even if they tire me out. Friends and family are the core of my existence. Danny says that since I don't have many creative projects (unlike Danny who has endless creative projects) that loving my family and friends is my hobby. So here I am writing on this blog and sending love to all of you! Enjoy your day as each day is a miracle!

4 days post op and doing great

I believe love and prayers in whatever form you do pray does heal. All of the love and prayers along with my strong spirit and excellent health helped me to get home quickly and is helping with my healing. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I am so grateful for all of your wonderful energy.

I am spending the bulk of my time in bed, resting, with some time in the fresh air too. My body is telling me what I can and need to do, yet my mind is challenging the body a bit. I am used to being active, but that just isn't a possibility right now.

Monday morning when I entered the hospital I was feeling in excellent physical shape, strong and healthy. I am not sure I would be home today if it weren't for my commitment to regular training the past few years. I now feel a stronger commitment to continue my training and to encourage others to do so as well. My upper body strength and my core strength are helping me all day long. I need that just to get in and out of bed.

My time in the hospital was as positive as it could be. I was so lucky to have Sierra by my side where generally patients don't have family members with them, both pre surgery and in recovery after surgery. And then I had my entire family with me after the surgery. I don't remember much about that night. Tuesday I stayed in bed all day. My intuition told me to rest and rest is what I did. Kaiser has a television station that has healing soft music with beautiful scenes from nature. I had the station on all day and dozed in and out and felt very peaceful. Wednesday morning I woke at 6 and again my intuition said, get up now, which I did. I knew I needed to start to move and get my body active again. It was good too as I was getting some fluid in the lungs. I told Danny I need to get strong and go home before I get sick in the hospital. So when my Dr. said I could probably go home in the evening I did everything I could to make it happen. Driving home was the most challenging time I've ever had in a car. I was miserable. I should have taken a stronger pain medication, but I never considered how sensitive I would be to every bump in the car. Again, my strength helped here. I spent as much time as I could holding my body off the seat, either pushing my legs to lift me, or holding onto the handle and pulling myself up off the seat.

It's great to be home. I am up for visits. I am up for movie recommendations. Next week I may be up for driving to the flat area of Kenwood and short walks. I've got my mom here this week. She is taking good care of me.

Thank you for the cards, the flowers, the love, the good thoughts, and especially for the support of my family. I know this has been a hard time for each person in a different way and your love has helped everyone.

Homeward bound

Great news! Mom is home tonight in her own bed! She did great today, walking around the hospital hallways with Annie and me a few times, eating well and generally making great progress. By late afternoon the decision was made that everything was in order for her to go home earlier than expected. Danny drove down to the city after school today and took Mom and Annie back to Kenwood. A hot shower at home, homemade chicken soup and now settling into her own bed. . . Alan and I flew back to LA tonight; by phone she sounds tired and good. Sweet dreams!

A good day

Yesterday was quite a whirlwind of a day. A few memorable moments in addition to those that Sky so beautifully mentioned in his post:
The pre-op area nurse, Eva, who was wonderful and compassionate, showed Mom Kaiser's "CARE" television station with relaxation music and beautiful scenes of nature for soothing and meditation. We had that on in the pre-op area while all the final paperwork was being done, IV was being put in, etc. and she's had this station on in her room for much of today. After she was all prepared in the pre-op area, Dad, Annie and I (Sierra) were with her.
Dad arrived from his first morning of school with his new class with cards and a perfect, lavendar colored rose that his new students had brought in for mom! (He had sent a letter explaining why he'd be missing part of the first and second days of school and these thoughtful families reached out with support before even meeting any of us. Wow!)
We each received many text messages, voice mails and emails from so many of you who were then able to pass along the chain of healing as we had more information about how things had gone.
One thing we forgot to mention here was the good news that Dr. Powell gave us: the PET scan was negative (ie: clear). We were very, very happy to hear that!
Yesterday Mom re-read many of the cards that she received over the last week or so and it was wonderful to see how they made her smile. It was very special to be able to be all together, Dad, Annie, Sky and I, with mom in her room as she settled in last night. Dad stayed with her overnight and they both slept pretty well from what I understand.

Today Ellen is one step further on her journey of healing! She reports that today has been a good day. She's been resting on and off all day surrounded by love. Danny and Annie have been with her for most of the day. She's had a few other special visitors and has been nourished with delicious, home-cooked food from Lindy and Annie. Yum! Alan and I are on our way to visit with her this evening; Danny will stay the night with her again tonight before heading back to be with his new class tomorrow morning.
Tomorrow, the big step will be for her to get out of bed and start walking with the nurses. She's looking forward to that after a day of much needed, and well deserved, rest. Her voice has sounded stronger and stronger throughout the day. Currently, the estimates are that she'll be heading home on Thursday or Friday to continue her healing in Kenwood.
It has been truly amazing to be a witness to the amount of love and support Mom has. I know I speak for my whole family when I say how much it means to all of us to have all of you in our lives. Thank you! Let the healing continue!

The healing has begun!!!

From the beginning of today mom has had the visualization that the healing has begun. She was super blessed to have Sierra with her most of the day. Everyone here at Kaiser has been terrific. There were many delays because all of the caregivers seemed to be eating at the moment they were to be taking care of mom but she was okay with that because that meant that they were all happy and energized when they did show up. The surgery seems to have gone smoothly. Mom looks great and is resting in her own room at Kaiser. She currently has Danny, Sierra, Annie, and me (Sky) at her side as well as three nurses caring for her. Ellen is currently very comfortable. I think the pain Meds are doing what they are supposed to do. Hopefully mom will allow herself to be cared for and to have lots of healing energy time. She would prefer to have minimal visits tomorrow as Sierra has said tomorrow might be painful and emotional. Lotsof love to all. Will post more later. Enough typing on this lil iPhone for now.

Sunday preparations

Good news! The BART strike has been averted. This means I get to sleep in my own bed tonight instead of going to San Francisco. I spent the entire day at home relaxing with my family and a few special friends who dropped by for a bit. Tomorrow, Sierra and I will leave around 7:30 to get to San Francisco Kaiser with plenty of time to spare before my first appointment. Danny will be coming be there about noon. San Francisco Kaiser is at 2425 Geary. I was born there! I can't seem to locate the phone number there, not sure if this is the correct number or not...415-833-2239.
I missed two calls from Dr. Powell. She called yesterday while I was seeing Julie and Julia. She called again this morning, at the same time my cell phone, Danny's cell phone and our land line were all ringing. She left basically the same message that she will be seeing me on Monday. So I have no further news regarding the PET Scan. She did say my surgery might be earlier in the day and asked me to be available to come in earlier. The next entry on the blog will be by someone in the family. I'm signing off for a few days. Thanks for all the love, prayers and support!

Surgery is confirmed for Monday the 17th

Second path report came in this afternoon. I haven't seen it yet. Dr. Powell was in surgery, but let me know the status., which is Surgery is still on for Monday. Now it is scheduled for 1:45 in the afternoon. Sunday I am on a liquid diet only and no food after midnight....I think it will be a long day on Monday! I have also been told my surgery will be 182 minutes. That is an estimate, but I think it is pretty funny, instead of 180 minutes to say 182 minutes.
I am not sure when I will hear about the PET Scan as Dr. Powell is going out of town for the weekend, so she will not get the results tomorrow.
I can't say I am surprised by the news, but regardless I am still somewhat disappointed.
Kaiser gave me a CD of relaxation music and visualizations to do before surgery. There are also visualizations to do after surgery. I will be spending time with that for the next few days.
I'm off to bed now. I'm looking forward to sweet dreams!

Waiting for test results

Today I hope to get the results from the second read of my biopsy. If the second read is the same as the first then I will be having surgery on Monday.

I spent 2 hours in my pre op appointment yesterday. I had a physical, at least the kind you get before getting an operation. One thing that was interesting about this physical was that I was checked out to see how access is to my airway for anesthesia. My last surgery I had an epidural and I don't remember this kind of exam. Sierra was with me. We both felt it there were many aspects of a very inefficient system. I was seen by 3 nurses. The first was a nice person, but neither of us were impressed by her nursing skills. The second we really liked. The only problem was she asked all the same questions and repeated all the same information the first nurse did. The third was a nurse practitioner. She asked all the same questions again and repeated the same information but was a bit more formal than the first two nurses I saw. I think the entire process could have been done in 30 minutes.

Next was the PET Scan. That was an interesting experience. It was in a trailer on Geary Street. I felt like I was in a Space Ship. It was cold inside and felt like it was rocking a bit from the wind outside. FYI, a PET scan, I have been told is the best test to see if there are any tumors in your body. I should have the results to this on Friday.

I really don't like needles. One arm had blood drawn from the other had an IV of radioactive glucose (that was for the PET Scan).

I am glad all of this is behind me.

I am planning to shop today for a few supplies for the hospital and for my recovery period.
I have a short business meeting and will spend some time with Danny in his classroom.

There is no good timing for a medical challenge. Sadly, my surgery is scheduled for Danny's first day of school. The plan right now is he will meet his kids and stay at school until recess and then come to SF and be with me. He will stay with me through Tuesday and really start school on Wednesday.

Every day I get more messages of how I am surrounded by love. I KNOW love heals. It healed me before and it will again.

Navigating through the medical system

Sierra was my guide and navigator today. She started by making calls and arranging for us to get the slides of my biopsy from Santa Rosa Kaiser. Our task today was to get the slides to UCSF for a second read. If the second read is the same as the first read, I will have surgery on Monday, August 17th. Here is one of the challenges. We have no official order at UCSF to do the second read. We do have Dr. Leong, a specialist of melanoma, overseeing this request as Sierra knows him and has been consulting with him. Sierra had to encourage me to get organized and get on the road. I seem to be moving slower than usual and get side tracked easily. I totally appreciated her coaching me to stay focused and get going. Danny was the chauffeur. He navigated us through the traffic to SF. Danny, Sierra and I had a great day in SF. Delivering the slides was a smooth task. We then had lunch in Buena Vista Park. The is a park in SF that Danny and I have never been to. Danny was born and raised in SF, and I lived there for high school and neither of us had ever been to Buena Vista Park! We also went to a nice coffee shop we had never been too. I don't drink coffee anymore and had a treat of an Orangina. I have many fond memories on having Orangina in France and in Spain.

The navigating continued. While at the park, I got a call to arrange a Pet Scan. So, my whole body is going to scanned, to hopefully confirm I don't have any other tumors. I will be doing this on Wednesday. I have one big trip to SF Wednesday, my pre op appointment at the hospital and then the Pet Scan. I also received a call from my new Dr., Dr. Bethan Powell who I met last Friday. My appointment with her was almost 3 hours long. Sierra (my daughter) and Nancy (my super good friend) were with me. She called to let me know to see if I needed help with getting my slides looked at at UCSF. She also let me know who she had been consulting with regarding my case. I really believe she is a fantastic Dr. and a good match for me. On Friday we had many questions to ask. We basically didn't have to answer anything as Dr. Powell covered it all, and more! And here is more navigating. My wonderful daughter has reviewed some the information at that visit since then. There was a lot to comprehend on Friday!

More phone calls. UCSF needs a letter from Dr. Powell to do the second reading. Phew, talked with Dr. Powell's assistant. She called Dr. Powell and the letter was written and faxed to UCSF. They assured us they will do the reading of the slides tomorrow.

I have been told I will be in the hospital 3 - 7 days. My recovery will be about a month. I hope and pray that this will be the end of this chapter.

After several days being in shock and an emotional wreck, I am now focused on my love of life, as well as how grateful I am for my family and friends.

This week I will be preparing mentally, physically and spiritually to make my surgery and the healing afterward go as well as it can.

I know love heals. I truly appreciate all the love being sent my way.
Please know I am sending love and gratitude right back to you.

Ellen is 'the cat's meow', the cream in my coffee', the star that lights my way even in the brightness of the day.

As the sun rises a bit later each day and you take the time to breathe in all the perfection that is creation, and all of us around you do the same, we know that we are all connected and whole. I am never surprised when I see you open your eyes to see LOVE in them from the moment of their first blinking. It is who you are through and through and I hope you know you are surrounded by the love of all of us sending it right back to you. Isn't it a wonderful 'law' of the universe that we truly get what we give. I send out my words of appreciation for all the beautyand good health that we are blessed with. I know that in being a positive part of the one energy that makes us all connected that I contribute just a little bit to manifesting this beauty and good health in our lives. I love you my Aelena! You are the light of my life. And so, I am yours.

My first post

Today Alan, my wonderful son in love has helped me to create this blog.
I am so happy he has done this. This will be a new way for me to communicate with those I love so much, as I proceed in this new adventure of healing.